So, you’re engaged? Yay, congratulations!

Let’s step away from the vows and veils for a moment and consider the pre-wedding events. Specifically, the Bridal shower and the Bachelorette party.

You probably have tons of questions!

Like, what on earth is the difference between a bridal shower and a bachelorette party? Do you have them both or just one? Who plans what? Who do you invite?

Yes, it sounds pretty confusing, doesn’t it?

But with this guide, the difference between a bridal shower vs a bachelorette party will become clear, and you’ll be able to know which to have and how to plan it.

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Is a Bridal Shower The Same as a Bachelorette Party?

No definitely not. And don’t mix up the guest lists for these parties either! The bachelorette party is normally for you and your pals to celebrate that last bit of ‘freedom’ as a single gal. Think party games and drinking. Although, sober bachelorette parties are becoming more popular! The bridal shower is typically tamer with a focus on gift giving, refreshments and a few games sprinkled in.

When To Have What?

The bachelorette party is usually held a couple of months before the wedding (hangovers are not helpful when you’re getting married!) and the bridal shower is typically a couple of weeks before the wedding.

How Long Is a Bridal Shower vs Bachelorette Party?

A bridal shower is normally a few hours long whereas a bachelorette party is at least a night, and in many cases, a whole weekend.

Who Hosts?

Someone close to the bride such as the mother, future mother-in-law, maid of honour or friend usually organises the bridal shower. The maid of honour or bridesmaids typically organises the bachelorette.

Is a Bachelorette Party Just For The Bridal Party?

No, the bachelorette party can include other guests who are not in the bridal party. And depending on the type of bachelorette party you intend to have you may not even want to invite some members of the bridal party. Things may get a bit too wild for the mother of the bride! Obviously, communicate this to them so there are no hard feelings. Honestly, they may feel relief!

Who To Invite To Each Party?

Bridal showers are a more intimate event with close family and members of the bridal party like the maid of honour and the bridesmaids. Bachelorette parties often include friends and even colleagues.

Make sure that anyone invited to a bridal shower or bachelorette party is also invited to the wedding. Otherwise, things are going to get very awkward!

Also, keep in mind the suitability of the activities you choose. If you want to organise a raucous weekend away with lots of partying and questionable games (ahem!), you may not want to invite sweet 80-year-old Aunt Sally! On the other hand…

Male Friends

What if you have close male friends? Traditionally, both the bridal shower and the bachelorette party are all-women events. But there’s no reason why the bride can’t invite her close male friends. Ensure other guests are comfortable with this and make separate bookings for any accommodation. Don’t be afraid to break traditions! These events are for you after all.

Party Gifts

A bridal shower is typically a gift-giving event for the bride. A bachelorette party does not usually include gifts, the focus being on having a good time! Favours are sometimes given by the bride to the guests, though.

Bridal Shower vs Bachelorette Party: Who Pays For What?

The host usually pays for the bridal shower. If multiple people are hosting, they can split the costs. As it’s usually held in someone’s home, the costs most likely are refreshments, decorations, and any entertainment.

With a bachelorette party, it depends. In the past, the maid of honour and bridesmaids may have covered the cost of the bride’s portion. Today things are a bit different. With more brides opting for expensive weekends away, the costs are usually shared equally between all attendees.

Whatever way you choose to go it’s important to communicate to all involved what everyone is expected to pay, and by what time.

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Bridal Shower Ideas

The bridal shower is usually focused on the bride opening gifts, chatting, and having some food. Add a little extra fun with a bridal shower quiz or include an activity. You could hire a professional to do beauty treatments or keep it low-key with a scavenger hunt. Add a guestbook for guests to write advice to the bride or offer a bucket list and date night suggestions.

Bachelorette Party Ideas

Organising a bachelorette party can be a lot of fun. What you plan will heavily depend on your preferences, the guests, and the budget.

Weekend Away Ideas:

  • Hire a place on Airbnb
  • Vegas/casino night
  • Europe
  • Murder Mystery
  • Theatre/concert
  • Glamping
  • Wine tasting/tour
  • Clubbing

Budget/Low-key Ideas

  • DIY spa (manicure/pedicure)
  • Crafting (Jewellery making, paper flowers, painting ceramics)
  • Tea Party
  • Dinner at a restaurant/takeaway
  • Cocktail making
  • Karaoke
  • Scavenger hunt
  • Fancy dress
  • Pyjama party

Don’t forget, there are no rules when planning your pre-wedding events.

Though, it’s probably wise not to organise every event possible because that would be way too stressful.

If the idea of having any of these events fills you with dread, here’s some good news. You don’t have to do them! Yeah, really!

More than anything, this time is about you and your fiancé. Eliminate the expectations and celebrate the way you want.

Now onto the wedding planning!

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